Dinosaurs are SO not in God's plan. This is taught in Science class in Kansas, but the poor folks in Wisconsin and Indiana are woefully behind the times.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Excerpt from the Kansas Life-Science Text 2006:
The Great Comet bore the dinosaur-eating virus to Earth. Its impact caused such an imbalance in Earth's rotation that massive quakes and resultant tsunamis were triggered.
Mammals understandably perceived The Great Comet as a sign from God that Mammals should rule the world. With the Dinos dying of the rapidly mutating DFQT-1, the Mammals prayed, and launched a series of well staged attacks with WMD. The slingshot was the most accurate.
The Dinos were so shocked at this un-neighborly treatment in their time of illness that they fell over clutching their chests, and swearing that they would rather die than be a part of fueling the Mammals' petty way of life. Their hearts were not strong enough. They expired.
The Mammals praised God for his righteousness by documenting the story in their B.C. (Before Comet) Live Journals which eventually became known as the book of Genesis, The Great Comet.
Well dammit, I hadn't heard that. These Kansans always seem to be one step, ahead. There ought to be a law or something... Some kind of mandate about text books.
Are thinking of that tired old theory about a humongous asteroid hitting the earth and disrupting the climate by throwing up clouds of debris that blocked out the sun planetwide? No, it was a comet. The earth passsed through the tail of a comet, and the dust settled to the earth and turned most living creatures to dust, except for a few who turned into psychopathic zombie dinosaurs who attacked all the rest of the dinorsaurs.
Not to disrupt the funny stuff going on here, but I read an article a few years back that suggested that the global temperature only would have needed to increase by a few degrees to kill off the dinosaurs. The article asserted that a slightly increased temperature may have rendered dinosaurs sterile, because sperm are sensitive to high temperature (which is why they are housed outside of the body proper). Their sperm cells couldn't take the heat, and the dinosaurs ran out of heirs. Nothing fancy. No painful writhing around on the ground in agony or freezing to death in a Pitch Black-esque Ice Age. Just a bunch of really, really horny dinosaurs humping their way into extinction.
I would think that the temperature would have to have risen rather quickly, for the animals not to have evolved. Were dinosaurs' sperm producing organs outside of their bodies (like mammals')?
The thing is, an extinction period of a thousand years is still nearly instantaneous, relatively speaking. Of course, I don't know what the actual elapsed time was.
But anyway, I suppose a giant asteroid hitting the earth could have raised the temp by a few degrees, and they wouldn't have been killed by a dust cloud or tsunami or something catastrophic.
To be honest, I don't know enough about dinosaurs to know whether they had external scrota. I also don't know enough about the fossil record to know how long the extinction process took.
You definitely have a point about the timeframe. In my simple mind, something like an asteroid or a comet or somesuch would be the easiest way to have a global temperature increase fast enough to circumvent evolution.
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chiming
Have you not read the preface to Genesis????
Date: 2006-03-01 01:24 am (UTC)From:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Excerpt from the Kansas Life-Science Text 2006:
The Great Comet bore the dinosaur-eating virus to Earth. Its impact caused such an imbalance in Earth's rotation that massive quakes and resultant tsunamis were triggered.
Mammals understandably perceived The Great Comet as a sign from God that Mammals should rule the world. With the Dinos dying of the rapidly mutating DFQT-1, the Mammals prayed, and launched a series of well staged attacks with WMD. The slingshot was the most accurate.
The Dinos were so shocked at this un-neighborly treatment in their time of illness that they fell over clutching their chests, and swearing that they would rather die than be a part of fueling the Mammals' petty way of life. Their hearts were not strong enough. They expired.
The Mammals praised God for his righteousness by documenting the story in their B.C. (Before Comet) Live Journals which eventually became known as the book of Genesis, The Great Comet.
Re: Have you not read the preface to Genesis????
Date: 2006-03-01 03:18 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-01 04:02 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-01 04:03 am (UTC)From:Re: Have you not read the preface to Genesis????
Date: 2006-03-01 11:01 am (UTC)From:Re: Have you not read the preface to Genesis????
Date: 2006-03-01 04:59 pm (UTC)From:Re: Have you not read the preface to Genesis????
Date: 2006-03-01 09:35 pm (UTC)From:That ran through my thoughts too!
I forgot to add on a tag about the age of mammals being linked to global warming as a result of burning Dinofuel. Guess that's New Testament stuff?
..
Date: 2006-03-01 09:43 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-02 03:49 am (UTC)From:..
Date: 2006-03-02 04:05 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-02 04:44 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-03 05:33 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-04 05:38 am (UTC)From:The thing is, an extinction period of a thousand years is still nearly instantaneous, relatively speaking. Of course, I don't know what the actual elapsed time was.
But anyway, I suppose a giant asteroid hitting the earth could have raised the temp by a few degrees, and they wouldn't have been killed by a dust cloud or tsunami or something catastrophic.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-04 04:39 pm (UTC)From:You definitely have a point about the timeframe. In my simple mind, something like an asteroid or a comet or somesuch would be the easiest way to have a global temperature increase fast enough to circumvent evolution.