rhetorical question for Mausi, Ms. Fleur and Ilona

[low_delta]

Where do you find those needy people?

Comments

[serendipity.livejournal.com]

I can answer this one, even though I didn't respond to Ms Effi's post. There are a whole lotta needy people out there, and sometimes it's hard to tell at the onset of a friendship if your friend is going to end up sucking the positive energy right out of you or not. Sometimes friendships seem well balanced, a genuine give-and-take, or give-and-give, or even take-and-take, for that matter (oh, did I forget take-and-give?). But then, gradually over time we might learn the hard way that a friend is taking more than we can give and/or is giving far less than what we might need or want. It's basically a terrible imbalance, one that can be extremely emotionally draining if we let it.

We all have different levels of tolerance for neediness. The trick is to know your limits and be willing and able to do something about a relationship that's encroaching or exceeding those limits.

The real answer, I guess, is that those needy people are everywhere, and they find kind-hearted and compassionate people everywhere too.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I guess I was just thought they weren't that common, since I don't recall having problems with people like that. Or maybe I just let them know right off the bat that I don't tolerate that neediness. ??

[fleur.livejournal.com]

I tell ya, if I knew I'd quit hanging out there.

Seriously, K seemed normal when I met her. Usually I have pretty good radar for that kind of crap but this one snuck in. After I got to know her a little bit I started to realize she was sortof a pain but by then she was calling me all the time and wanting to hang out and thought we were such buds.