traditions and addiction

[low_delta]

Here's something I wrote ten years ago. I made only one tiny change.

I don't have many addictions. Or habits. Or rituals or traditions.

They bother me. I don't like being held prisoner by something that doesn't necessarily make sense. I don't smoke. There's no little thing I always have to do just because I always do it. For example, I don't care for the idea of always sleeping on the same side of the bed. I lose a small bit of control of myself when I find myself relying on something being a certain way.

If I do something the same way every time, there should be a good reason for it. I always drive on the right side of the road, because to do otherwise is not worth the fines. I take that back - I don't always drive on the right side of the road. Um... I follow very closely a certain routine in the morning because that's what gets me out of the house the fastest. I sit in the same place at the table every night because Cyn always sits in the other place. I always undo my seatbelt before turning the car off, because then I won't have my keys in my hand when I'm trying to undo the buckle.

Wedding receptions? I hhate wedding receptions. Too many things you have to do just because everybody expects them. You have to toss the garter. And you have do the chicken dance. And Steve has to have the DJ play "Another One Bites the Dust." And you have to mash cake in each other's faces. And you have to kiss when everyone rings their glasses. Of course, many people will say that these things aren't done just as traditions. You do all that stuff because it's fun. Well... yes and no. They survived as traditions because a lot of people thought they were fun, but the reason we do them is because we have to. And if we don't, we are questioned.

Christmas is full of traditions and rituals. Not for me. Christmas is nice because there are decorations and we get together with the family, but for me there's no it just isn't Christmas without...

I'm not completely immune. I'm sure I have some habits that are for no good reason, and that I don't notice or have forgotten about. And I have had my own little traditions (I used to always play Crosby Still & Nash on shuffle. Why? Just because I always did), but I can't think of any current ones. I'm sure Cyn will remind me. And I am addicted to the internet. I just can't turn off the computer.

Comments

[sunshine-two.livejournal.com]

aaaah but, you have hoarding tendencies. That's a habit.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

I ask myself whether I should keep something or get rid of it. So that's making a decision each time. My problem is that once I've made the decision to keep it, it becomes very difficult to later get rid of it. But I occasionally go through things, and decide on each item, and much of it gets kept. Almost all of my hoardy stuff is still from the old days - before I realized I had a problem and mostly cut off new stuff.

[sunshine-two.livejournal.com]

If you realize it, that's half the problem.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

I'm not a hoarder!

[sunshine-two.livejournal.com]

lol

[pondhopper.livejournal.com]

I think a lot of people love certain traditions and find joy in them...just as valid as your not wanting to be tied down by any. Both points of view are good and I pick and choose those that give me joy. Manolo and I did not mash cake into each other's faces at our wedding because I said NO WAY. LOL
Frankly I don't do anything just because it's expected of me. If it is something that shows respect for others, then yes, even though it might not be my thing. It all depends.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

If it is something that shows respect for others

Theoretically, that's a good enough reason by itself to do the thing.

[pondhopper.livejournal.com]

It absolutely is!

[smittenbyu]

I am the same way... believe I got it from my dad.. He would always make us think/question why traditions are a certain way and rituals - oh my - India is filled with them! We did away quite a few at my wedding but my in-laws added them back in. It was not a time for me to pick a fight, I guess - so I played along. There are some pictures of dad and I from the wedding where we were looking VERY displeased! lol...

A new tradition has been born in my circle is using social media to wish everyone happy-name-of-festival! So, mom-in-law feels I have forgotten the said-festival (which does happen because, I have no "I must celebrate everything" rule) as I didn't post any acknowledgment of the festival on FB! ;)

I am sure I have some habits that make others wonder. My "addiction" since daughter was born is drinking tea and now bringing coffee to work!

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

we were looking VERY displeased!

You'd think that would be a good enough reason to leave a tradition behind.

I'm not a fan of tradition, but my addictions tend to annoy me. I don't like being beholden to anything, even myself!

[ravenfeather.livejournal.com]

Independence is not everyone's personality trait, and there are lots of levels of independence of thought. While you don't like to do something just because it is expected, I actively FIGHT to not do something just because it is expected.

:) Extremism in politics and religion bothers the crap out of me, but I suspect it is because I have an extremist streak in me.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

I'm independent and just generally different. I guess I like to be different, and prove it. So that leads to... pushback.

[therobertpaul.livejournal.com]

Oh I love this. It has the right amount of curmudgeon charm (not too much, not too little).

In the 1990s, my friends and I would begin and end every road trip by playing The 1812 Overture. I suppose arriving safely in Richmond with only the occasional stop a roadside McDonald's seemed as epic to us as defeating Napoleon.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

I just have to be contrary. Sometimes even with myself.

[rivendweller.livejournal.com]

"Question Authority." I've always been that way, so I suppose I question traditions, too. Lately I've come to believe it's somewhat genetic. My ancestors were revolutionaries. I've found at least 20 of them fought in the American Revolution.

I like some traditions, though. I like Thanksgiving and Christmas because of the family bonding.

Mashing the cake in the face is awful. That's a tradition that needs to die.

I, too, am addicted to the internet.

[low-delta.livejournal.com]

I like Thanksgiving and Christmas because of the family bonding.

Well then you're not doing it because it's a tradition to get together, you're doing it because it's good to see the family. The tradition of doing the holidays just makes the togetherness convenient.

The cake in the face is so juvenile. I mean, if you and your spouse think it's funny, go for it, but...

[serendipity.livejournal.com]

Uh-oh, don't get me started on holiday, religious, and other social traditions... hate 'em, or at least most of 'em.