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funerals, or not
Jan. 6th, 2018 11:49 pmOn Tuesday I posted that my friend's dad was dying. He departed on Wednesday morning. Once things went downhill, the end was mercifully quick.
He had specified that he wanted no services after he was gone. I guess the family got together, but there was nothing for friends or acquaintances. I'm sorry, but I don't think the deceased gets to make that call. He can suggest it, but if the family feels the need to have some sort of service, then that's their business. If people need to say goodbye, then they should have that chance. If people need the support of their friends in a time of grief, then they should be able to get it.
I understand that not everybody wants to go through a public grieving. Or even the hassle of setting up a funeral. And maybe some families are all on the same page about it, and just say that it was the wishes of the deceased, so others will buy it. And that people want to honor the wishes of their dying loved one. But that person needs to put his own wishes aside for the sake of his family.
It's very much like taking all of your comments with you when you delete your journal. "I want you to think about me as little as possible in the coming days."
He had specified that he wanted no services after he was gone. I guess the family got together, but there was nothing for friends or acquaintances. I'm sorry, but I don't think the deceased gets to make that call. He can suggest it, but if the family feels the need to have some sort of service, then that's their business. If people need to say goodbye, then they should have that chance. If people need the support of their friends in a time of grief, then they should be able to get it.
I understand that not everybody wants to go through a public grieving. Or even the hassle of setting up a funeral. And maybe some families are all on the same page about it, and just say that it was the wishes of the deceased, so others will buy it. And that people want to honor the wishes of their dying loved one. But that person needs to put his own wishes aside for the sake of his family.
It's very much like taking all of your comments with you when you delete your journal. "I want you to think about me as little as possible in the coming days."
